This photo was taken a year ago…June 24th with my precious cousin Karen and her little girl Elli, a.k.a. “lollipop”…
My other cousin Syn-d, Karen’s sister, snapped this moment with her phone while we waited for our breakfast that summer morning in that little Destin diner. ~ I never knew this would be our last trip together…our last few precious moments together. Our last laughs, our last goodbyes. My heart was broken when my dad with trembling lip and tear filled eyes, clinging to my sorrowful mom, shared the tragic news with me that my precious cousin Karen had fallen while rock climbing in west Virginia. I have been told that she instantly went to be with the Lord, after her 60 ft. fall on June 12, 2010.
The news media reported the story on the local stations and in the papers. Our family created a facebook group in her memory, with links to all of the articles and news report. To her honor over 400 of her friends and family have joined and journaled their memories of how her life touched them in some way.
~
Last year, we spent a week at SanDestin Beach Resort with the cuzins and the kids on our traditional family vacation…
Moments that seemed so fleeting and non-momentous, even silly perhaps, are now precious stones of remembrance that my heart will embrace forever…
That week at the beach we celebrated Karen’s 33rd birthday on the June 23rd eating out @ her requested place…PF Chengs.
The day after we came home from the beach, June 25th was my 30th B’day. Syn-D cooked my favorite tex mex meal that night at our grandma’s house, chicken fajitas, delicious homemade guacamole and salsa!
Karen and the kids went out that afternoon and surprised me with princess party decorations and princess bling! Elli was quick to pull me over to the table she had prepared with all the pink bling bling jewelry, which she so fashionably bejeweled me with. She was so serious and sweet in those moments treating me on my birthday.
We all put a few rings on our fingers and played a fun round of pin the tail on the donkey. It was one grand party!
This particular shared birthday moment I celebrated with my cousin Karen, I will now cherish forever. We both opened presents and cards from the family that night after dinner. And we caught a round of those infectious silly southern giggles with our pink bling during gift time!
I’m missing her more each passing day. For some reason during the afternoon setting sun I think about her the most. Thoughts abound of her family, her children, the life left behind, and her glorious new life in heaven – which most of all gives me hope.
My life will forever be marked from this point on, like a stone of remembrance, a book mark or pause that awakened my soul to a newness of celebrating small moments and insignificant pleasures…a phone call, a letter, a text or an email. Our relationships and our love have greater meaning to me than ever before, they are more beautiful and special. They are now more worthy of celebration and worthy of experiencing.
My heart is stirred to a new level of comprehending as I embrace the true value of life and our moments together. A piece of my heart was torn apart as she was torn from earth that day. But as my brother David so poignantly stated, “she may have fallen on earth, but she stood up in heaven.”
I watched Karen’s six year old daughter Ellianna, leave the funeral home after saying goodbye to her mommy. She held her little best friends hand as they walked toward the car, her best friend sobbing and weeping over the understanding of loosing her “Auntie Karen.” Sweet Elli, in the form and spirit of her mommy, took her friend by the hand, embraced her and whispered to her, “It’s going to be all right.” Those words pierced my heart as if Karen were holding my hand and speaking them herself. “It’s going to be all right.” I don’t know how, or when, but I know that’s what Karen would be saying right now if she could embrace us and show us the eternal glory.
I will miss my angel-cousin Karen, every part of her, she is so beautiful and I love her deeply. This is one of the songs I had the privilege of singing at her memorial service. The words truly reflected our heart to the Lord and her beautiful life.
*Please pray for Karen’s family (the Feher’s), her parents (the Esterlines), her sister, her brother and the community of friends and family that are grieving during this loss.